Recently I was called to see a young lady referred by a medical doctor.
I seldom see clients out of my office but after the doctor described to me her situation I understood it was a special case and I agreed to go to his office to see her…
According to the doctor, she makes no eye contact with him (or anyone including her own father, who brought her to the clinic) and so he could not have a proper consultation with her. The progressive doctor is specialized in chelation therapy and she’s put on it. When he checks on her in the chelation room receiving her IV drip, she would just look through him and ignore him. And he felt she doesn’t want to be treated like a “patient” and that he may not be the best person to help her talk about her issues.
The main reason the father took her to see the doctor was for her weight. She had seen the psychiatrist(s), nutritionist(s) and dietitian(s)… and other health practitioners, and her weight did not shift.
As the chelation therapy is 3-hour long, he got her permission to book me in to see her while she’s on her intravenous chelation drip – smart strategy as she would be “captive audience”!
I went into the room and greeted her. With the help of the nurse, I started diffusing an essential oil blend called “Joy” (a popular one among my clients) with my portable diffuser and dimmed the light down. (It is a heart opening and uplifting blend.)
I sat adjacent to her and started a casual chat. It did not bother me that she did not look at me most of the time. She was just “in her own world”. (And who among us isn’t really in some ways?) But we are able to communicate with a combination of mandarin, English and body language… As I gave her some “Joy” in her palm to inhale, she took to it very positively, and was pleased to learn that it contains Rose oil. She said she has been told it was supposed to be good for her. (Phew! That’s a good start…!)
I asked her why she was there, her diet and her lifestyle. She did not have the attention span to complete the comprehensive questionnaire I gave her. But I checked her hand to get a sense of where she is at. (It is TCM Hand Diagnosis Techniques I was trained in.)
I understand that she is quite resigned about seeing “another nutritionist”, and the doctor had made it clear to her I was not a “nutritionist”, but a “holistic health consultant”. I assured her from the outset I was not there to tell her to eat less and exercise.
After understanding her diet and lifestyle, while I can see there is much to work on, it’s also clear that she is not in the mental space to make changes to her familiar dietary and lifestyle habits yet. Besides, from my initial assessment, overeating is not the main cause of her obesity. And she lacks the energy and motivation to exercise. Hormone balancing, emotional healing and being inspired about her life would be of more priority.
She was fidgeting a bit from the IV drip and for sitting for too long not being able to move. The nurse had to come in and out to tend to her a few times. So the session was interrupted often and did not proceed like a “normal” one in my own office.
I offered my “Valor” blend for her to inhale. (It’s a blend that promotes centering, focus, hormone balancing and self esteem.)
She started to open up to talk more about her personal life. She was diagnosed with ADD since teenage and was medicated for sometime, which she suspected was not a good idea for her and it did not help. She was just having a hard time adapting to a new environment having moved to the foreign country. (I can see why she resented being treated like a patient.) And from our exploration together, we found out that she had experienced emotionally traumatic events that took place a little after being medicated for ADD. She started to gain weight and became obese and have stayed that way for almost 15 years. I asked her if she saw any connection between her weight gain and those events and she could see it.
We managed to do EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) and a short guided meditation. And throughout the session, I let her inhale “Frankincense” and “Valor”, both of which I have used to facilitate my other holistic coaching sessions.
I have started incorporating these tools more in my work after learning from other practitioners who have used these successfully, including psychotherapists who reported shortening treatment period by half. (Exchanging experiences with like-minded practitioners has greatly helped me improve the efficiency of my work.)
At the end of the session, I used muscle response test to see how strongly she feels innately capable of healing and restoring healthy weight, and it was over 80% strong.
The next day, the doctor called me and asked me excitedly what I have done with her, as for the first time she had eye contact with him and actually had a proper conversation with him! And she said she would like to see me again.
We both breathed a sigh of relief.
I agree with the doctor that it’s quite a “tough case”. (He warned me about that in the beginning!) And it may take some time to help her restore balance. But both the doctor and I think we are moving in the right direction…
While I would not go out of my way to find “tough cases” like her (!), I believe I would not be sent someone without a “reason”… Either my integrative approach could help them, or I can think of someone who I can work with to help them. Being able to inspire someone who have “tried everything” to see new light really energizes me.
Power to her, to natural healing and to open-minded doctors…!
Additional Note (20th Dec 2013): Saw my young client again, she told me she used EFT tapping to deal with a recent emotionally stressful event. Woah I am so proud. (Honestly I did NOT really expect her to remember the EFT tapping I showed her last session…) In this session she gave me full eye contact the whole time and did not fidget at all. She was very present and I was able to infuse nutritional education in between coaching facilitated by “oil sniffing” and visualization. New information about stress, caffeine and weight gain was well received. And she asked to order the Joy blend and lemon oil to have with her to feel good and help her lose weight, and she promises to see me again after the holidays to embark on her wellness transformation for the new year.
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