I must have “died” in my sleep…

This weekend I had a very vivid dream – it felt so real that I really “get” what my friend Anita Moorjani has described how after her NDE the physical reality feels like an illusion because she has experienced the “truth” in the other side.  Her perspective on life was forever transformed.

Have you had vivid dreams so vivid that when you woke up you were reluctant because the dream world seemed more real?  Usually we feel that way for a little while and everything would go back to “normal”…

There’s something different this time for me.  While the physical reality is very “real” to me and I have no doubt about being in it soon after the dream, the experience of the “reality” of the other side remained very clear – not so much in the details of what happened, but in the “recognition” of it as truly real and “original”…like I know this place/state.

In the dream, I was with a very loving being whom I related to as my father (who in reality passed on 5 years ago).  But he was without his ego self. (Like how Anita Moorjani describes in her book “Dying to be Me” what it was like for her when she saw her father who died 10 years prior in her NDE… She explained here.)  In the dream I also knew he was not supposed to be physically “alive”. And I was very happy and appreciative that we were spending time together “there”. I felt really really grateful and happy and I knew he did too. The “joy” is not a strong elation but a very solid, steady, innate kind of peace, that seems timeless. It’s not the kind of “joy” that comes and goes. It’s not the first time I had a similar dream of him but this time it’s clear that there is a deeper significance to it than me having thought about him.

As many people who have had NDE (near death experience) describe, the other state is not a linear reality.  There’s no time and space. Everything is experienced at the same time. And whatever you focus your mind on (like zooming in a google map) you experience it there and then.

It felt a bit like that in my dream. In another scene I was not with my father anymore but with a friend and ex-colleague. She’s still “alive” in this life but living in another country and I hardly get to see her. Again in my dream, I related to this being without her ego state. In fact what is common with the interaction with these two beings is that in my dream I experienced them as the “same person”. They just showed up in different forms.

And in the dream with them, I felt very reassured, very protected, very “at home”, unconditionally loved and supported by them. We did not really exchange too many words in the dream. Words seem a little clumpsy there.  It felt to me like they were to reassure me and encourage me, and that whatever challenges I am facing in my life are not “real”.  It was as if they want me to remember what is really “real”.

When I woke up I thought to myself I must have just had a glimpse of that love and light state that everyone who had died and come back refer to, because it felt so real and so complete.  (There is no want or desire. It’s completion itself…)

It has given “don’t take life seriously” a deeper understanding for me.

In an earlier entry “Going Home” I wrote years ago, I wrote that we have

“experienced ‘death’ every moment, at the cellular level.  Every moment our cells are dying and being created.  This arbitrary “life” and ‘death’ is a continuous process in every aspect of our ‘life’.  We discard old beliefs and create new ones.  Every night we go to sleep and the next morning we wake up.   Our consciousness dies and is being newly created every moment”…

And in that entry I said I have never experienced an “NDE” and that processing my father’s death was the closest thing to having an NDE, and having a “rebirth” from a new realization.

I think this weekend, while many people are busy “sweeping graves”, I just had another “rebirth”. I must have “died” in my sleep – and I really do not mind it happening more…

THANK YOU for the amazing reminder!!!